update!

it's been a while, huh? i don't like coming on here because i usually just posted for my friends to see. i don't think any of them even go on blogger anymore, so i didn't really feel like posting. but maybe i can, because this almost feels like an online diary.
so here's an update on my life.

from my last post, i've dragged myself quickly out of naruto hell. thank christ. another thing, i broke up with my girlfriend (more on this later). i've made two best friends, two people i hold very close to my heart, by the name of jack and koda. they both helped me a lot, still do, and they basically introduced me into my new love, gravity falls. started in late january, i got into cosplaying mabel pines, and now, i'm just. in love with the show. the show and the characters, that is. with jack, i started a fanfic, called I Made Mistakes In My Mind (which got some attention- much to my surprise). we are now writing the sequel, Love Is A Polaroid. it's extremely fun, so that's something that helps. ever since Divided shut down it's been hard for me to find stuff to lose myself in- so i'm glad i have jack and koda. speaking of koda, me and them have been making oc rps, left and right. i've started writing as Bea again, started developing Oliver and Lea more, it's incredible. i love it. i love writing as all of those characters.

now onto the more depressing news.

as school began, drama and sara and allie and everyone came back and hit me hard. immediately into the school year, i've struggled with keeping myself up. i've self harmed plenty, nearly killed myself multiple times. it's. not good.

i'm not sure as to what to do.

but! i'll keep going. i have people to be here for. people i love, people i want to see grow.
i'm mostly afraid of causing others to want to kill themselves due to my death.

scrunches nose

another thing, more context with my girlfriend, i made a big mistake with leaving that relationship. i fell for others but i never got over her. after i broke up with her i realized what had happened- i'm polyamorous. i wish i couldve realized this sooner, maybe i could have saved allie heartbreak, and myself confusion. i still have so many feelings for her. but, well, what can you do.
she doesn't want to talk to me anymore.

hhhaa. man, what an update, right? what a start to my junior year. i'm just hoping i can keep myself together, keep my thoughts together.

expect updates, vents, rants, idk what. i'm feeling too much lately.

-bea

Oliver Ace Vindico

As I said a few posts back, I have a new character. I actually really like him. No one else does. One of my friends especially. She said he was stupid. ._. but! I shall still love him, because he's awesome, and kinda like, the only POC character. :\ we weren't really good with that. I'm trying to fix that. Anyways!!! Here's my new character that I adore!!!!!! :D

Oliver Ace Vindico

Gender:

Male, Gender-fluid

Age:

20 years old (Birthday being November 11th)

Height:

6’ 3’’

Status:

Antagonist/Neutral

Ranking:

He’s part of the aerials, just another solider of the Shadows. He prefers to go bye himself, and usually strays from the main group that he’s assigned to. He likes to fancy himself as a higher ranking, as he should be, but every time he almost gets promoted he ends up pulling a prank or doing something wrong, and does not. He also is a part of the Shadows more casual side, where people work to give food, or heal, or anything. Instead of being useful, he has a tattoo parlor. Though, he’s pretty popular.

Power:

He’s an animator. Not one who writes and makes cartoons, but instead, can bring inanimate objects to life, or make things that can come to life. Think of Mickey Mouse and the wizard hat. How he’s able to animate the broom to be able to work for him. Oliver can do that. Although, he usually does it with slightly more fun objects, and with better motivation. This is also why he has a tattoo parlor. He gives people moving tattoos, such as a tree blowing in an imaginary wind, a cat licking its paw, etc. 

Besides his animation ability, he has one ace up his sleeve that earned him a spot in the aerials: he has wings. A spinoff of Darel and Shade’s experiment, Lea decided to take her stepbrother and give him the DNA of a hawk, and with that, came wings, an hawk’s vision. He uses a sniper rifle to take out his enemies from above.

Appearance:

Oliver has shaggy black hair that’s spiked up in the back, and always wind swept. It occasionally falls into his eyes, a dark, dark brown color. He likes to wear eyeliner around his eyes. He has light, pale skin, usually only dirt smudges marking up his cheeks. He usually wears plain t-shirts, and a long, black trench coat over it. Wrapped around his neck, he has a red scarf given to him by his sister, though it’s a bit old and dirty from the years. He likes to wear skinny jeans, and bright red chucks. He has massive black wings (usually hidden under the trench coat - but you can see slits in the trench coat where the wings can peek through) that have a span of three of him. They usually brush the ground behind his feet.

On his back he has a sniper rifle, strapped around, and on his belt he always has more rounds, ready to be in action at any moment. He has tattoo sleeves, with Japanese art, dragons, cherry blossoms, and samurais. On his back he has a dragon, reaching from his neck to his ass, and it swirls around, occasionally blowing flames along his shoulders.

Personality:

Oliver has a heart of gold, and a mind that doesn’t really know what’s going on. When he was brought into the Shadows, Lea went into his head, and poked around until she rewired it so that he doesn’t have any morals. He honestly doesn’t think killing is bad, and kinda enjoys it when he’s in the air, thinking it’s a game. He’s extremely sweet, and very casual around everyone. He’s aromantic, and used to have flings with his friend, Bea, before she left to go to the Shadows. He loves to pull pranks, and also cause trouble, and generally has a care free vibe about him, not really caring for all that dull war stuff. He rarely ever gets serious.

Other Information:

Oliver is from South Korea, his mom marrying Lea’s father, and making him her step-brother. He was all for joining the Shadows, and joined when he was fifteen, making it his fifth year with them. Lea was originally going to ignore him, but started to grow a soft spot for him, and when she found out his ability to animate things, she decided to bring him in and make him more useful. 

Kill Count: 

He doesn’t like to keep a count (not that he would remember anyway).

And here's a picture of him! God. I love him. His wings are wrong but that' the best I could do. I assure you, he does not have tiny little bat wings. Nope. But so yeah! He's probably going to show up often now, since he has been properly introduced. c: Until next time!